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6 Reasons Why Tomb Raider Underworld Will Tank

Submitted by Danny_D on Thursday, 23 October 200851 Comments

Welcome to PS3 Attitude. Did you know we do all this for charity?

TRU Main 6 Reasons Why Tomb Raider Underworld Will TankSince lists appear to be all the rage recently, I would like to put in my two cents about Tomb Raider Underworld.

The Story (Part 1)

If the trailers released so far are any indication this one is going to be a doozy.

Lara appears to be unceremoniously pissed as she blows up her mansion (oooh she’s dark). She then goes on babbling about getting Thor’s belt to get Thor’s hammer to kill a god. Apparently her quest could bring the end of the world and she couldn’t care less. Did I say that Lara is dark?

At the end of the latest trailer Lara appears to be very distressed as she says “o noes”, which is followed by a female voice saying “I’m very pleased to see you again, Lara”…

Who could this mystery woman be? A long lost lover, disgruntled employee, her mother, her mother’s lover, her mother’s disgruntled employee’s lover, Lara’s stem celled clone? At this point it could be any of them.

TRU Title 6 Reasons Why Tomb Raider Underworld Will TankThe Title

Tomb Raider Underworld reminds me of the movie of the same name and actually makes me want to watch it again (or the crappy sequel) instead of getting me excited or intrigued for this game. What does Underworld has to do with the story revealed so far anyway? Nothing. Maybe they picked it out of a hat full of copyrighted Tomb Raider names.

Runner ups: Tomb Raider Milking The Cash Cow, Tomb Raider The Quest For More Money, Tomb Raider Lara’s Bogus Journey, Tomb Raider Beating The Already Beaten Dead Horse and Tomb Raider Big Boobs And Skimpy Outfits

TRU Story Part 2 6 Reasons Why Tomb Raider Underworld Will TankThe Story (Part 2…it’s gonna be epic yo!)

When I see a trailer for Tomb Raider’s story and I hear the word epic being blasted in rapid fire (3 times in 37 seconds) I listen. I listen loud and clear. This story is going to suck. Epically. Enough with the hype and the marketing jargon. If the game is any good we will do that for you. Perhaps they are in (epic) damage control already. If they realized that this latest (epic) game has really nothing (epic) to bring to the table, at least they can hype the (epic) crap out of it.


TRU Locations 6 Reasons Why Tomb Raider Underworld Will TankThe Locations

For 500 points, what do Thailand, Mexico and the Mediterranean have in common? Why Norse mythology of course! Wait…what? Even Valhalla and Helgardh may be thrown in for good measure.

I understand that diverse and exotic locations are a Tomb Raider must, but even for a gamer new to the franchise the locations revealed so far seem a little too far-fetched. I hope Crystal Dynamics has devised a clever way to tie them together. In the off chance that they are stumped, go ahead and give some suggestions in the comments. We’ll do our best to pass them on.

TRU Gameplay 6 Reasons Why Tomb Raider Underworld Will TankThe Gameplay Enhancements (or lack thereof)

Let’s talk motion capture. For the first time, Olympic calibre gymnast has been motion captured for Lara’s movements. Actually, this is the first time motion capture has been used for a Tomb Raider game. What does this milestone mean for gameplay? An unnecessary somersault, headstands, pirouettes, front and back flips thrown in liberally where they were not really needed.

Another “revolutionary” enhancement is the ability to shoot while grabbing on to a pillar, ledge or balance beam. Thank god for the power of the PS3 to finally pull that one off.

Also thanks to the next generation powerhouse systems Lara can balance walk not only in thin beams but also on poles. Poles! This never before gameplay element is actually boasted by one of the developers (Beneath the Surface 3 – What Can Lara Do? at the one minute mark); I kid you not.

TRU Story 3 6 Reasons Why Tomb Raider Underworld Will TankThe Story (Part 3)

Let’s see now, what else can I ridicule? It’s just so easy. Take it away Lara:

“I need Thor’s belt to get his hammer and I need the hammer to kill a god”

“Kill a god”? I am sorry to inform you Lady Croft that a chap by the name Kratos has beaten you to the proverbial punch. You see there was this game called God of War, surely you have heard of it, in which Kratos ultimately killed a little god named Ares. Which one will you kill?

Perhaps if she goes back to look for ancient relics or something… oh wait, Uncharted did that in a convincing manner not too long ago. Oh boy, now I get why this story seems to jump the shark at every turn. Tomb Raider was already done in HD for the PS3, but at that time Lara Croft had a penis and went by the name Nathan Drake.

Final Thought

One trailer goes on to say “Some ruins should never be discovered”. I say “Some games should never be made”. Is Tomb Raider Underworld such a game? In the end only you can decide by casting your vote the only way it will be heard: with money.

Well, there you have it. 6 reasons why I think tomb Raider Underworld will tank (epically). Do you agree? Do you disagree? State your case in the comments; I can’t wait to hear from you.

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  • LCaruana says:

    Actually, I’m looking forward to this game. I am a bit (ok very) dismayed by the exclusives the “other” console is getting for this title. It may be a bit similar to Uncharted, but that’s not a bad comparison. Uncharted was awesome. We don’t have much longer to wait now to see how it does.

  • Brodiesan says:

    I’ve enjoyed Tomb Raider in the past but the new footage released really doesn’t grab me. Maybe we’ve been spoilt by just how good Uncharted was/is (still have to complete it on Hard and Crushing!)

    As for “Beneath the Ashes” and “Lara’s Shadow”, the two exclusive chapters on the 360, I’m not that peeved to be honest. They’re obviously not vital for the plot of the game and they may purely be extra content for a game people might be wishing gets ends as quick as possible.

    Hats off to Microsoft though. They saw a possibility for exclusivity and they went for it.

  • Brodiesan says:

    And the first typo on the site goes to … Brodiesan.

    I have no idea what the last sentence in the 2nd paragraph means.

    I’ll try and clear it up: “They’re obviously not vital for the plot of the game and they may purely be extra content for a game people might be wishing would end as quickly as possible.”

    There, that’s better.

  • Panzerdemon says:

    These tomb raider games are getting old they are all the same and they seem to add little stuff at a time my friend is over hyped about all the tomb raider games and it just pisses me off after they are released i never hear anyone telling me to go pick it up cause it is an awesome game that i cannot go without i love uncharted far more than tomb raider Lara Croft doesn’t have any type of personality she is liked a shy little 6 year and only talks when she wants to sound Bad ass i am sick of these games they need to do something new with them make it interesting instead of buying the same old stuff maybe kill off Lara she needs to die anyway shes been around for way to long and it might have been fine if we never left the ps1 stage cause that’s when she was huge and amazing and brought a new aspect to the gaming community now its just the same thing over and over and i am sick of people over hyping this solid piece of crap.

  • Grannd says:

    To author:

    What the kind of bullcrap article is this, okay I’ll do all your silly ‘reasons’.

    1. Story part one. If you would’ve played attention on Tomb Raider Legend you would immediately recognise Lara’s dead mother in the trailer. Obviously you’re just trolling so you couldn’t care less if they finalle continued storylines for Tomb Raider games, which is a fucking big plus.

    2. The title. I bet you found Gears of War 2 an exciting title, or Final Fantasy X, or XI, or XII. Underworld is way more original than that, plus if the reason for the ‘underworld’ subtitle isn’t clear from the trailers, it doesn’t mean it’s not going to be in the game. You’d think someone who can speak English would know that.

    3. Story part two. What the hell are you bashing here, the use of the word epic? Why the hell are you watching the trailers if you don’t want to get an opinion of the game before it comes out. If you want to to make out your opinion from the game, not the trailers, I suggest you don’t watch the trailers and buy the game, dumbshit.

    4. The Locations. The locations are different enough, but you don’t know enough yet about the story to know how they’re linked, yeah, that sounds like a great reason not to buy the game. Come on, it’s great to have different locations, let them figure out how to link ‘em.

    5. Gameplay Enhancements. First of all, they’re called enhancements, which means that if the gameplay was great in the last games (like Legend and Anniversary), you won’t need many, guess what, the gameplay from Legend and Anniversary wás great. Maybe you mean Gameplay changes, I’ll explain something the gameplay of an adventure game is usually about thesame. So only if they’d want to make a totally different game a lot of gameplay changes would be needed, but it wouldn’t be Tomb Raider if they changed the formula.

    6. An Uncharted comparison? Are you serious? I’m seriously doubting if you’ve played either a Tomb Raider game or Uncharted in the past. Maybe you’ve missed it, but in Uncharted you shoot negroes, about 90% of the time, 10% of the time is spent for some easy jump puzzles. In Tomb Raider, 10% of gameplay is spent shooting, 90% is spent solving puzzles, and genuine adventuring.

    Some ruins should never be discovered, and some articles should never be written.

    Once the game is out, and it sucks, I give you the right to bash and troll all you want, but please buy the game before you go about bashing the hottest chick in games.

  • Danny_D says:

    To all:
    Thank you for your comments, I truly enjoy reading your different points of view.

    To Grannd:
    I enjoyed the PS2 version Tomb Raider Legend. In fact, it was my first Tomb Raider ever and I found it entertaining and worth my time and hard earned cash. It is just not worth my money if Underworld’s main (only?) draw is the continuation of the Legend storyline with nothing new or enticing to add to the game or the franchise. Or the genre for that matter, is this truly the best action/adventure games can do? To enjoy a good story I’d rather pick up a book or watch a movie, both much cheaper options.

    This is a next-gen game (with a next-gen price), just more of the same is not going to cut it anymore; not for me anyway (it . The games industry must hear this loud and clear. When they do, perhaps we will see true innovation in our so-called next-generation games.

    Do I want this game to fail? Not at all, I want this game to be good. Really good. I write because I care, perhaps Crystal Dynamics or Eidos will read my little article, that would be awesome.

    I want to play a truly great real next-gen Tomb Raider, a lot of us do. But from what I can see, I don’t think this may be it.

    Thank you for the EPIC comment Grannd, keep them coming guys and gals!

  • Brodiesan says:

    For the record: I’m still on the fence regarding TRU though, like all games, I wish it every success. I’ve already mentioned that the video footage I’ve seen doesn’t excite me a great deal but I’m open and willing to be bedazzled by a great game that scores well with the critics and sells well with the public.

    We don’t have long to wait to see if Danny_D has jumped the gun. I therefore look forward to his rebuttal/victory speech.

    And to Grannd, regarding your “in Uncharted you shoot negroes[sic], about 90% of the time” claim. I have to admit this comment came right out of left field to me and almost negates any credence to the rest of your many well stated counter arguments. Apart from the fact that the adversaries in Uncharted appear (to me at least) to be a wide array of ethnicities what are you trying to suggest here by highlighting an enemy’s skin-colour?

    Are you insinuating Uncharted is a racist game?

  • Panzerdemon says:

    uncharted has already been said to be a racist game and so has resident evil 5 im sick of all this shit where because you kill black people or hispanics that its suddenly racist when resident evil 4 was out and everyones kill white europians oh suddenly no one gives a shit but as soon as we go to africa and start killing black people (resident evil 5) NO its racist and we should put white people in africa to make people happy cause you know africa has a massive majority of white people im just sick of all these people who dont have shit to do so they pull the racist card who cares about race anymore leave it outa the games leave it outa everywhere deal with it and shut the fuck up

  • DolphGB says:

    Well said Panzerdemon.

    Well, apart from all the swearing of course! :-)

    If anyone is in any doubt about this, go read my old article –

    Just don’t hit me up because I said the game was set in Haiti. At the time of writing, that was what we’d been told. But it doesn’t change the argument…

  • Phreaky says:

    I have to say that I am a firm believer that TRU will be a half decent game. Think about it; the people that make TR games have now been doing it for a good few years – they know what works and what doesn’t.

    They also have Uncharted to contend with. It is worth bearing that in mind, because they sure as hell will have been saying one of 2 things:

    “How can we set this apart from Uncharted?” or
    “How can we make it better than Uncharted?”

    My 2 cents are on the former. In the end this is a franchise that everyone knows if not loves. There will be plenty of ‘gift purchases’ out of this and that alone will be enough to warrant the next TR incarnation.

  • Grannd says:

    Danny_D, if you want Underworld to be a good game, should you be writing these kinds of articles?
    I’d rather read an ‘6 things I want in Underworld’ if that’s the case.

    I’m not the one who started comparing Underworld to Uncharted, that’s Danny D here.
    Uncharted is an actiongame, with some adventure elements, the Tomb Raider games are just the way around, adventure games with some action elements. So in that way Uncharted and Tomb Raider can live perfectly beside each other.

    I said negroes because that what the enemies in Uncharted are, should I have said African-Americans? I can make them talk any language I want so I guess not. They’re just the locals on the islands in the Caribbean (?) where Uncharted plays out, except from the Gollum look a likes ofcourse.

  • josh3735 says:

    You call this an article? Yuck!

    Yes I am a Tomb Raider fan, (with strong reasons why to be one) and I felt compelled to make an account for this article alone. What you state in your article is nonsense. You try to redicule 6 points and If I could be bothered I would list 600 hundred points why your wrong, but I won’t waste my breath.

    Sorry to come off so strongly, but I really have to disagree with every your every word. I guess we will wait for the sale figures which will no doubt be epic. :D

  • BigR says:

    1. Its actually 4 reasons… you cant say 6 reasons and have “story” 3 times LOL

    2. “Story” – the so called mystery womans voice is believed to be Jaquiline Natla, Laras nemesis from the original Tomb Raider.
    Go ahead and make fun of these guys for sayin Epic every 5 seconds.. theyre just trying to promote the game…. i happen to think its funny…as for Tomb raider ripping off GOW and Uncharted…. Lara squared off against an egyptian god in TR the last revelation, which was a LONG time before Kratos was around…. and an even LONGER time before Nathan Drake went through a WHOLE video game without scoring with that Elena chick (seriously, he doesnt even get the chick. What kind of sad hero doesnt get the chick?)

    3. Title – “Underworld” actually refers to the structure of the levels in the game. As you go deeper into the ruins, at some point you stop running into panthers and tigers, and start encountering more supernatural enemies. Each level will have its own “Underworld” with its own enemies and atmosphere.

    4.Locations – You said you played Legend??? In Legend, you should remember that they touched on the idea that myths of different cultures were actually related…. were not doing math here, let yourself be entertained by the idea of Norse mythology having ties to the Mayan calender. Its a videogame Bro, its supposed to be fun.

    5.Gameplay enhancements – If you had played the old TR games, you would remember Lara moved like a tank…. seriously, at this point, ANYTHINGS a vast improvement over the old school stuff.

    6. How about you PLAY a game before coming to a decision on what makes it Tank…

    THATS… 6 points ;)

  • krycekuva says:

    ok,.. i agree with you , the word epic was repeated too much during promotion, it will still be repeated much more, so better get to it,..

    the rest?.. was the biggest load “sadly” of crap, only possible written by a unhappy prepubescent spoiled person who didn’t got a present… im not interested in offending,.. its just to get a profile out of what you read.

    and for the records, after reading this part “Underworld’s main (only?) draw is the continuation of the Legend storyline with nothing new or enticing to add to the game or the franchise.” can you please name me a sequel of anything which is not a continuation somehow of the previous part… by definition second parts are always continuation, if its not based or completing the story like million other products,.. i kind of dont get you,.. what else did you expected after seen legend unfinished storyline? a whole new tomb raider based on radical changes?… if you dont like tomb raider games dont buy tomb raider games,.. just like if you dont like horror games dont get a horror one,…

    the rest… well… i think you better play the game before reviewing it…

  • Mman says:

    The fact that Legend is the only TR game you played kind of explains the perpective of this article; it’s the one context I can understand the Uncharted comparisons, as, while I haven’t played it yet, everything I’ve seen and heard suggests Uncharted is essentially Legend 2.0 (an action-slanted game with the occasional simple puzzle and exploration element). While TR is supposed to be pretty much the opposite of that (and, with Anniversary, is well on its way back to that).

  • eatlimegreen says:

    Did you even pay attention to the story of legend underworld is where the story kind of ties up i don’t know why you said it was a rip-off of uncharted’s story tomb raider legend was made in 2006 before the ps3 was even released at the moment you kind of sound like an uncharted fanboy that doesn’t have his facts strait because every thing you seem to think about uncharted is contradicted by this article. For example you implied motion capture was unnecessary ummm uncharted used motion capture too you said that tomb raider underworld was a copy of uncharted but then you said they’ve already made a tomb raider on the ps3 called uncharted see what i mean….
    sorry but i’m going to totally have to disagree with you

  • danderson852 says:

    Idiot! What a rubbish article!! This website has rubbish servers, it’s very slow!! GET A LIFE DARLING! LOL

  • badboy70 says:

    6 Reasons why you’re wrong :

    The Story (Part 1)
    Did she say “My quest can destroy the world, but who cares ?” No she didn’t.
    Did you even PLAY Tomb Raider 1 or Anniversary, then surely you would recognize that voice.

    The Title
    Then let’s call it Tomb Raider 9, shall we ? Unless you have a better name.

    The Story (Part 2…it’s gonna be epic yo!)
    And your point is …. ?

    The Locations
    Why don’t you go write and article about Tomb Raider 3, where Lara goes from India to Nevada, London…
    What links them ? I already hear you say.
    Answer : the artifacts, of course !

    The Gameplay Enhancements (or lack thereof)
    So you’d rather have crappy animations, and all Lara has is a single jump run and crawl animation. Great ! There’s so much variety I can barely remember all the moves in your game.

    The Story (Part 3)
    There are many gods ‘y know. It’s not ’cause Kratos killed one they’re all gone.

    And why are you comparing Uncharted with Underworld ? They barely have anythnig in common.

    Final Thought
    Why don’t you just BUY the game and then review it, meanwhile, go and play the previous Tomb Raider games. Since you seem to know shit about Tomb Raider.

  • Danny_D says:

    I played Legend, I liked the game.
    I played Uncharted, I thought “So this is like Tomb Raider with a penis”. I had mixed feelings about the game.
    I saw what Underworld has put out there for us to get excited about the game, it drove me to write this article.

    To krycekuva:
    We don’t need radical changes, we need to overcome the silly limitations blamed or driven by the previous generation of consoles in this “next-gen” era and I don’t see that happening in Underworld. Not yet anyway.

    To eatlimegreen (nice name by the way):
    Did we really had to wait for a PS3 Tomb Raider for motion capture? Would we have noticed if no one told us that motion capture was used instead of traditional 3D animation? Uncharted used mo-cap for the cut-scenes and, for the most part, it worked well. If Underworld uses mo-cap just to capture one headstand, or one cartwheel and then re-use that single animation for every headstand or cartwheel I won’t see the real value of it. My prediction was even more unnecessary cartwheels and flips as a result. I think the trailers support my prediction.

    To badboy70:
    Some people may argue that there is just ONE lord and savior ;)
    But seriously, I just find the presentation silly is all. If I found out about god killing WHILE I was playing the game, my feelings about it may differ. They are promoting the game, fine by me. They want me to buy this game; sure thing, state your case: “Play as Lara Croft! She wants to kill a god! Motion captured cartwheels! EPIC!” I don’t think so.

    I still strongly believe this game will tank (epically). Most people can “tell” if a game is good or bad from gameplay trailers and other promotional material available pre-launch. I know I can. Since I can’t “just buy” the game as many have suggested (in the nicest possible manner I might add), I can only write my opinions based on what Eidos/Crystal Dynamics released so far to the public. Just as you, my dear readers, are writing about what I shared with you all.

    Keep your comments coming along, at least for Lara’s sake. I have a sneaking suspicion that she will need your moral support soon.

  • Brum says:

    So, as others have before me, I’m going to tackle each of your points one by one…

    The Story
    I do somewhat agree with you on the idea that ‘dark’ anti-heroes seem to be all the rage at the moment. However, Lara Croft has always been a borderline heroine – killing endangered species and men alike, stealing artefacts from their rightful resting place for her own personal whims – in essence she is wholly selfish. This is not to say she is ‘evil’, and she certainly stands on higher moral grounds than the villains she encounters.
    And yes, the voice at the end should be instantly recognisable as being that of Jacqueline Natla; the villain from Anniversary. Predictable? Perhaps. Cliched? Perhaps. But I’ll withhold judgement to see how they actually use her in game, and how they explain her presence and motivations…

    The Title
    The title ‘Underworld’ most definitely links into the theme of the game. In each location, Lara delves into the mythology’s underworld – Avalon, Xibalba, Helheim, Valhalla – mythological underworlds.
    The title also maintains with the one word titles ‘Legend’, ‘Anniversary’, maintaining a theme. What would you rather as a title? Personally, I prefer one word titles, and I think Underworld is simple, yet effective.

    The Story Part 2
    Okay, perhaps the word ‘epic’ is used a tad too frequently – but that certainly doesn’t warrant a reason for why the game will tank. The developers have latched onto their usage of the word, in fact, and almost parodied themselves by continuing.

    The Locations
    A concept introduced in Legend is that of the ‘monomyth’. In Tomb Raider lore, it seems, there was one original race of ancients, from whom all of the worlds’ mythologies and tribes originated. Following this line of thought, it is perfectly possible that Lara’s quest for Avalon would have her globe-trotting – why would the Ancients place the key and the door in the same place? They want to make it a challenge, at least.

    The Gameplay Enhancements
    Okay, so some of the new gameplay mechanics aren’t exactly revolutionary – but it’s a case of how they integrate with the environments and feel of the game, rather than on their own merits. My only qualm is that Lara seems to move too quickly – which I find a distraction and may inhibit the game experience, but I’ll wait and see…

    The Story Part 3
    Not only God of War – but many games feature relatively human characters taking on superhuman, seemingly invincible enemies. It’s a standard video game characteristic (not to mention film, comic, books etc). It’s all about how its executed – because at the end of the day – there exists no originality in narrative – even seemingly original stories rely on stereotypes and expectations being reversed.
    And comparing Tomb Raider to Drake’s Fortune is a moot point. The only similarities they bare are – exotic locations, and a search for ancient relics. The nature of the experience, however, is different entirely. Tomb Raider is adventure, with periods of action (though Legend seemed to bump up the action), and Drake’s Fortune is the opposite. Only the visual characteristics seem similar in a way. Tomb Raider & Drake’s Fortune hold less resemblance than the multitude of FPS games set in a post-apocalyptic future, for example…
    Also, you seem to think as if developers of Tomb Raider have looked at Drake’s Fortune and realised that the relic-hunting business is lucrative. Not so; as is obvious – Tomb Raider came before Drake’s Fortune. the latter game draws more inspiration from Indiana Jones in its style than Tomb Raider.
    However, you not only compare the games, but the characters of those games. Lara Croft and Nathan Drake are nothing alike. That much, even despite their genders, is obvious.

    Final thoughts
    As a Tomb Raider fan, you may argue that I’m biased in my opinions (as well as perhaps being more versed in the intricacies of the TR universe) – but I’ve attempted to level with you on certain points and approach this from a relatively open-minded view.
    Oh, and I’ll definitely be buying this game ;)

    Would love to hear back from you,

  • zenmecha1 says:

    Hey, folks who’re reading this article!

    I’ve gotta tell you a breaking news! The guy who wrote this lame blog said such a line before “I enjoyed the PS2 version Tomb Raider Legend. In fact, it was my first Tomb Raider ever and I found it entertaining and worth my time and hard earned cash”

    How can any hardcore TR fan believe in the words said by such a person who has only played TRL before? TRL was only a good game, but obviously can’t hold a candle to classics like TR1 and TR4. Tomb Raider is about exploration and puzzle solving. If you think some puzzles in Legend already pissed you off, then just go ignoring Underworld, and don’t write such a make-ppl-laugh-their-a**es-off article here plz.

    To the owner of this blog: Tomb Raider Legend is only a “casual” TR game, of which some aspects can’t even be regarded as Tomb Raider. Obviously you know about nothing that made old TRs top.

  • Elishar says:

    Ok I would like to pick at your terrible slating in sections reflecting in what you ahve said in each one.

    The story - How can you possibly tell she’s pissed? It’sa video so you can’t possibly have any kind of vague coutline wether she has or not – it’s not like you can small liquer on her breath.
    Secondly you say about this ‘mystery woman’… You can not slate a game when you clearly have had no previous experience in any of the games. If you had any sense in your head it would have been a more sensible thing to suggest it may be Amanda who she thinks she has ridded of in Legend, but you obviously have no previous experience in these games ro youre just plain stupid, another reason is if you bothered to look on you’d realise there is a ‘design of Amanda (possible spoiler)’ section there, if you were a true fan would you not have reconized that?
    The Title- If it was copyright, do you serisouly think they’d have been able to release it under that name? Oh would you look at that, no they wouldn’t. If Lara was all skimpy clothes and big tits do you think they’d have any interested gamers rather than some horny old men? Think about it logically because if thats all she was, straight girls like me would have no interest in the game.
    The story (part 2)- I’m sure this game is more epic than your lfe will ever be. It is indeed an epic adventure and you can;t possibly slate the fact its not epic when its not even out to play yet and you havent experienced it for yourself.
    The locations- The places clearly have no real life connection, but have you not stopped to consider that in the game she may discover certain discovereies or are you forgetting this is a fictional game and not a true story?
    The Gameplay Enhancements – If they did not add these and all Lara could do is exactly the same as what she could in the last, I bet you any money you would complain that they have not enhanced the amount of things Lara could do. It better to progress than to regress even if you think it doesn’t ned to be there in the first place. And the whole comment on being able to shoot while holding onto a beam, wow mr game animator, I’d like to see you create a game with the complexity of what the people who have made this game have done.
    The Story (part 3)- You seem to have it indented into your mind that there is only allowed to be one game where they can discovre ancient relics or kill gods. That can happen in more than one game because, once again, you’re forgetting the concept that this is not real life and no gods have been killed in real life, so therefore Lara can kill as many gods as they would like her to because previous games have not, and nerv will actually affect the real world in such a way that they cant possibly make similar games.

    Reading what you have writ has made me wonder what the hell you do with your time, because I hope its planning a better storyline and creating your own company to make modern day games, which I expect you would undoubtedly fail at because you have put across the idea that your brain spans no further than the real world.
    So basically you took your time writing a buch of crap that any REAL fan of Tomb Raider, like me, could easily make up counter arguements for because all of what you written has been opinionated and untrue.

    I lookforward to buying the game and, regardless to your stupid slating of the game, I bet you will buy it too.

  • badboy70 says:

    I haven’t played the XBOX360 Demo. I’m waiting for the PC one but if you have a look at those stats from

    Definately lived up to the hype! Lovin’ it!
    More than satisfied!
    Not particularly satisfied!
    Extremely unsatisfied!

    It doesn’t seeem like it will tank ;)

  • Brodiesan says:

    Though I’m on record stating that I will wait to see reviews and play it myself before claiming it’s “tanked” I just want to comment on the stats that have been presented above by badboy70. (Thanks Badboy70!)

    Over 20% of people are NOT satisfied. That’s 1 in 5 people. And we’re talking about gamers who are voting on a forum that is DEDICATED to Lara and her adventures. These are the FANS of the game – not the people that usually don’t play Tomb Raider or couldn’t care less.

    You could spin these stats to claim over half the people out there believe the new game has/will live up to the hype but I’m more concerned with the large chunk of people who are on a TR forum in the first place and still bothered to vote for dissatisfaction.

    Could these people be just haters of the game and are voting out of spite? Perhaps – but the figure is so high I’m finding it hard to believe there is some sort of movement out there (with Danny_D at its helm) who are purposely campaigning to knock the game.

    Of course, this is based on the demo and not the game so this is not empirical proof that Danny_D is on to something here.

    In conclusion: I’m still going to wait and see. But – that above poll has done exactly the opposite of what you intended for me. I’m even more worried now!

  • Brum says:

    A similar poll for Legend would undoubtedly reveal similar results.
    It could be said that Tomb Raider fans are more picky, and their expectations ridiculously high, and so are unsatisfied with the segment of game with which they’re presented. They may not see difficult puzzles and the like, but this is merely a demo and thus it is possible that they’ll be satisfied with the full game.

    Elishar – the meaning of the word ‘pissed’ in this article is ‘pissed off’, as in annoyed. Not drunk. lol.
    Also as I’ve said, the voice is not Amanda (although she is to return), it is NATLA! I’m willing to go as far to say that such is fact.
    And no, Danny_D is not necessarily a fan, but a consumer like the many people who would buy this game, not just the fans.

  • Elishar says:

    Brum – sorry for my misunderstanding of his use of the term pissed, but when I use pissed in context i use it meaning drunk, otherwise youd say pissed off?
    And would it not ahve been more logical for him to have said it was Amanda even if its not, which you have clearly stated it isn’t, but hes just made himself look stupid by writing a bunch of random stuff instead of any decent guess as to who it could be.
    And I understand he isnt a real fan, but if he isn;t then why is he writing a blog trying to put down the game and all that when he hardly knows anything about them?
    If he doesnt know he just shouldn’t bother writing about it at all.

  • Brodiesan says:

    Good points Brum though I wouldn’t have placed Tomb Raider fans in the category of “known demographic of gamers that are particularly hard to please” myself – especially considering the vast majority of sales come not from non-core but more casual gamers who are familiar with Lara as an iconic character in the gaming media.

    I make this point based on the fact that Tomb Raider: Angel of Darkness was flouted publicly as having major bugs yet released to the market anyway. I admit I never played it but I know some who have (and also remember the backlash from the fans in the gaming trades back in the day) yet this major quality faux pas in the series did not dent the sales of the follow-up “Legend”.

    You’d think that the fans, annoyed at the previous poorly designed game they’d forked their hard earned money on, would desert the franchise completely. This didn’t happen which, to me at least, proves that Tomb Raider fans are a dedicated bunch though not necessarily a “hard to please” one.

    Just my 2c.

  • Elishar says:

    Brodiesan – I agree, I played and complete TR Angel of Darkness and it was no where near as good as Legend. But something about AOD had a more realistic touch to it until nearer the end. I do not think that game was the best, however I think Legend and Anniversary really made up for it, and obviously the game being bettre than the one before, so I’m excited to see how Underworld will be as I think the last game was brilliant I am looking forward to see how much better Underworld will be.

  • Brum says:

    Elishar – Why just ‘pissed’? Well, it’s an American slang term; in Britain if someone said they were ‘pissed’ we’d assume they meant drunk too lol.

  • Elishar says:

    Brum – yea I actually thought the guy meant she was pissed as in drunk. And I am from the UK so I was like… What?
    And I watched the video and I was like ‘how does she even look pissed?’.
    Oh deaaar, now I look like a really stupid person !

  • Brum says:

    Sorry for double post – my browser malfunctioned lol.

    Brodiesan – I understand where you’re coming from. But the thing about Tomb Raider fans is that they’re an extremely varied bunch. They’ve been introduced to the franchise by various different means and mediums – some have played since the first game in 1996, some were enticed by the movie, some were introduced by Legend etc… and so, we have varied Tomb Raider fans all with differing ideas of what makes Tomb Raider, and what makes Lara Croft. So, in answer – yeah, obviously some are easy to please and others; not so. You might call them the ‘hardcore’ fans who hold the classic games in very high esteem.

  • Danny_D says:

    To Elishar and all our UK readers:
    Yes, most (all?) variations of “pissed”, “pissed off”, “pissy” (when referring to a mood) for us American speaking folk mean the same thing: mad, angry, bad mood, etc… Shame on me for not taking into account all our UK readers. Sorry mates, I’ll go to my naughty mat now…

    To badboy70, Brodie and Brum:
    Thanks for the stats badboy70, great observation Brodie and good point Brum. It’s hard to please everyone, more so if you are dealing wit people who hold a franchise very close to their hearts. With that being said, hardcore fans alone will not make or break this game. But the general gaming population will, and that includes casual TR gamers, so called outsiders, or newly labeled “dumbsh…” like myself (thanks Grannd, I love you too). And most of us are not impressed. With quality titles out there and more on our way, TRU looks to me like a PS3 port of Legend (now with continued storyline! epic!) Crystal Dynamics is “phoning in”. In more harsh and direct words (so there are no misunderstandings here), a half-assed attempt to cash in Legend and Anniversary’s popularity and success.

    Conspiracy theory warning: Was this newly found success and popularity for the TR franchise only possible because Angel of Darkness was such a failure? Were Legend and Anniversary regarded as “good games” only because the world was comparing them to a major disaster?
    I would like to quote BigR: “seriously, at this point, ANYTHINGS a vast improvement over the old school stuff”. I could not disagree more. Just because someone was able to sell me a “crap sandwich”, I’m not going to praise and buy tons of their new and improved “dirt sandwich” just because they want me to think “hey, it’s better than crap!”. I can still taste the crap and that made me a smarter shopper. Now where is my “Snot Smoothie”?

    Going from horrible to ok, or even good, is fairly easy. You can see that in American culture; they seem to love their celebrities the most after rehab, after they completely hit rock bottom and embarrass themselves publicly.

    Gotta love low expectations, no?

  • Brum says:

    I agree, it isn’t the hardcore TR fans who’ll guarantee the success of the game – and I suppose your standpoint is valid since you represent, somewhat, the casual gamer in regards to Underworld. But, you do not represent the majority – but your own opinion. If there genuinely is a wave of gamers thinking Underworld will tank, and who share your opinions to the point of not buying the game – I’d like to see evidence of that lol.

    Ha, I don’t think the failure of AoD was intentional, but it certainly did provide a tool for bashing in order to sell when they were promoting Legend. It was a way of realising the faults of the past and ushering in the new era, with a new development team (now in sunny California, not ol’ Derby), a new engine and hopefully a fresh start for the franchise. But, although Legend was alright; it wasn’t exceptional. Had it not been Tomb Raider – would it be as successful? There is something in the status of the games rather than their quality, I agree. But Anniversary, and subsequently Underworld, have attempted to re-capture that original Tomb Raider quality, albeit updated and modernised.
    To me, Underworld doesn’t seem a half-assed attempt on cashing in, I honestly believe developers have taken onboard certain criticisms and are attempting to provide us wit the best experience possible. It’s still a business, yes, and not everyone can be pleased.

  • Brodiesan says:

    The failure of AoD was not intentional but it WAS avoidable. EIDOS/CORE admitted that the game was shipped early so its generated retail revenue would fall within the particular financial year.

    In other words: the suits said: “No TR this year? Our profits are going to be DOWN! Our shareholders are going to be pissed! (Not drunk). How far along are we with AoD?”

    “There are about [insert massive number] bugs. Some of them critical. It’s not publishable.”

    “Can the game PHYSICALLY be completed in its current format?”

    “Well … yes, but …”

    “Release it.”

    So, the fault is not with the engineers but with the decision-makers in the background. I’ve heard that there are some really nice aspects to AoD that are now completed over-shadowed by its flagrant defects which is a real shame.

    Back on point: the jury is still out on TRU. The gameplay videos are not inspiring a lot of people, a large portion of fans are underwhelmed with the recent demo and, this just in, Danny eats shit sandwiches.

  • Danny_D says:

    this just in, Danny eats shit sandwiches.

    Never again, it was too nutty for my taste.

  • badboy70 says:

    I’m not a hardcore TR fan, I even ditched TR for a while since AOD came.
    I like the AOD now, however.
    Still TRU looks pretty good, and certainly not a PS3 version of Legend ;)

    Tomorrow, when the PC demo is released, play it and then decide if it’s going to tank or not.

    An update on the stats :

    Definately lived up to the hype! Lovin’ it!

    More than satisfied!

    Not particularly satisfied!

    Extremely unsatisfied!

    Seems like more than 3/4 of all people are at least statisfied ;)

  • Brodiesan says:

    A drop in less than half a percentage in the unhappy camp is not something to be shouting from the rooftops!

    As we’re already said: we WILL be checking out TRU. We WILL be reviewing it and we WILL be making Danny eat shit sandwiches if it gets good reviews and doesn’t reek of tankage.

    Not long to go now. 19 days until the official release.

  • Danny_D says:

    I smell a bet coming up…or is that one of Brodie’s sandwiches?

  • Elishar says:

    Danny_D – Yea you should ahve considered it, you should have also considered it makes you look like a cocky twat when you add the little sarcastic comment at the end of it.

  • Danny_D says:

    “Conceal me what I am, and be my aid
    For such disguise as haply shall become
    The form of my intent.”

  • can says:

    Have you played TR:U ? If not, do not bullshit the game or It’s story. I’ve played the demo version on 10th October in a fair. It’s pretty good enough with gameplay and story.

  • Brum says:

    Danny, have you played the demo? If you have, what are your thoughts on it? Unfortunately, I haven’t as I do not own an X-Box 360 or a decent enough PC lol.

  • Danny_D says:

    Hi Brum, glad to hear from you again.
    Sadly, I am in your same exact situation. No 360 in my house and my current PC can barely handle Text Twist and a handful of SpongeBob games.

    Did you know?
    Danny_D abandoned console for PC gaming after the N64 era, only to abandon PC gaming for the PS2. The rest as they say, is history.

  • [...] back to back (I still haven’t played MGS one, you know).  We get yet another exhilarating Tomb Raider Underworld “Beneath The Surface” video, and 2 free TRU themes.   Premium themes make a comeback, [...]

  • [...] like a waste of a concept.  I was secretly hoping to be proved wrong about my initial thoughts on gameplay enhancements and be confronted with beautifully fluid animations, but alas, I see no such thing (so far).  Oh [...]

  • [...] may have her detractors around these parts but it has to be said that the new Tomb Raider Underworld trailer really [...]

  • [...] Eidos wants to pull a fast one on all of us, they want us to beleive that Tomb Raider: Underworld is a good game worthy of our purchase.  But not by clever advertising, or by releasing a PSN demo or by making absolutely sure the developer lives up to its word.  They are thinking out of the box on this one, by trying to stop any review below 8 to go live until Monday.  Then that little thing called truth can take over, after they tricked you out of your hard earnd money.  But none of us are going to fall for that right?  After all, I did try to warn you. [...]

  • VuZuW says:

    Nice one Danny, loved this post! =P
    I pretty much never cared about Tomb Raider, and most probably I never will since it still does not interest me.
    There’s always Uncharted to dazzle us in the ‘Aerobic action & shooting combination with a little treasure hunting’ genre.

  • dylan says:

    Hm, like other people, you have managed to piss me off enough to make an account on this website, Danny_D!

    It’s currently March 18th, 2009. Which means Underworld has been out for around 3 or 4 months now, I believe? Correct me if I’m wrong, as I am doing to you right now! :P

    I hope you feel exremely retarded because everything you ASSUMED about the game was definately WRONG.

    “Lara appears to be unceremoniously pissed as she blows up her mansion (oooh she’s dark).”
    LOL! Lara never blew anything up! Shows just how much you know about the whole Tomb Raider franchise, so why are you making judgments? Anyway, it was actually a doppleganger Amanda & Natla sent after Lara. As BigR has stated above, the meaning behind the title ‘Underworld’ refers to the elevation of the game’s levels. I figured that was obvious, I even assumed that correctly before the game was released! Too bad you aren’t as smart as me :P ! He-he!

    Moving on, about the whole Greek Mythology concept regarding Tomb Raider, Eidos and Crystal Dynamics did not and ARE not copying anything from any other game out there today. Tomb Raider was created LONG before Uncharted, GOW, etc etc. So how can you compare any of these to TR?! That’s like saying water is copying soda, when I’m pretty sure water has been around a lot longer! ;P!

    Besides, she didn’t even kill a god! As I recall, the only things Lara killed in TR:UNDERWORLD were spiders, bats, tigers, black leopards, foreign men, giant octopus, sharks, thralls, and Jacqueline Natla! Again, shows how ignorant you are pertaining to Tomb Raider…

    “for a gamer new to the franchise the locations revealed so far seem a little too far-fetched.”
    OBVIOUSLY, you’re the one who is new, because those of us who have been with Lara since the 90’s know that her locations are always spread all over the world and ALWAYS tie together in the end. What did you expect?
    ‘Tomb Raider: Underworld (The North Version)’
    ‘Tomb Raider: Underworld (The East Version)’
    ‘Tomb Raider: Underworld (The South Version)’
    ‘Tomb Raider: Underworld (The West Version)’

    P.S. -
    TR: UNDERWORLD had the most beautiful, realistic, astonishing graphics put into it, and DEFINATELY met my expectations. If you feel differently, then you either A) set your standards too high, B) have poor taste in games, C) are jealous.
    tank that, biotch! He-he! ~Dylan

  • dylan says:

    P.S.S. the clock on this website is wrong, it really is actually March 18th! :P

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