“Nickleback made me play Guitar Hero”
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With the news that Chad Kroeger of Nickelback is blaming ‘rhythm action games’ for the lack of new US rock talent, your friendly PS3 Attitude conducted an independent survey amongst US teens to find out the real root of the story.
And all is not as it seems…
During our extensive survey we asked ‘what made you play with a three-quarter size plastic guitar instead of learning a full-size real instrument’, the answers came thick and fast. And it appears a pattern is forming.
Justin Casey Howels, a babysitter from Austin, TX, tells us “if it weren’t for Nickelback I wouldn’t have picked up Guitar Hero in the first place. Their brand of cheesy middle-of-the-road rock made me yearn for something more – how can I put this – rocky. The track list in the latest Guitar Hero game was full of bone-fide classics from real rock stars like Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band, Jimi Hendrix, Korn, Joe Satriani and Lynyrd Skynyrd. Thankfully that Nickelback bunch didn’t make it into the set list.”
Rhoda Lott, a motorcycle pizza delivery driver from Boston, MA, added “After I had heard ‘I wanna be a rock star’ for the ten thousandth time on our local radio station, I decided enough was enough. I needed a fix of real rock music and since I didn’t know how to play a real instrument, I picked up Rock Band from my local store. Now I can play and listen to some real music rather than having to listen to that Nickelback nonsense.”
The results of our survey show that 87.4%* of teens in the US have been driven to playing plastic guitars as a direct result of Nickelback’s music. A cruel irony indeed.
*We would like to remind readers that 38.26% of statistics are made up.
i hate nickleback sooo much and that dumb white rap song (i wanna be a rockstar) makes me 29.52% more sick when i think about it. and 48.75% more when i hear it. if i ever see chad Kroeger on the street i will whoop his little a$# with a plastic guitar with nails hammered into it, Wooden bats are overrated, i save mine for when the Zombie robot nazi crocs take over the earth! W))T