Trophy Wars – Week 5.5 – Victory
The night sky blossoms with the sight of a thousand stars exploding in unison. The United State of Danny is crowned the Trophy King while the others, defeated in their attempts to dethrone him, acknowledge his superior whoring; doffing their hats in respect to a magnificent display of opulence and salaciousness.
Fellow State, King Majiesto of Majiesto, makes a late charge for the title, and though he jumps two positions on the pecking order, it is too little and far too late.
Kawaiiland is coronated Queen of all Precious Metals though her eyes secretly remain fixed on the ultimate prize; so firmly gripped now by the encrusted gauntlet of The United State.
There is much drinking and whoring of a different kind as the eight States send off the War in style – inebriated and complaining how San Brodie inspected their trophies each week at the wrong time to find most of the combatants hadn’t even updated their war cabinets in time for the count.
We changed things around a little for the final week of our Trophy War, pulling the stats mid-week to placate the whining from certain members of the team who thought Danny was getting an unfair advantage (even though, technically, it was the other way around).
Final? Don’t worry, we know there are those out there that have been enjoying our little mock war as we pit the members of the PS3 Attitude team against each, so this is not the last time you’ll be reading about who got the better of who.
The purpose of this dalliance into creative writing/statistics overkill was to introduce the team to you – our growing readership – and show that we can take a break from delivering new and exciting PS3 news each day and have a little fun.
The “Trophy War” will resurface in a new format going forward as we change the frequency to once a month. We’re also hoping to bring you, the reader, into the battle in more ways than one, but expect more on this in the future.
Because I know you just love the numbers, here’s the final figures of our five (and a half) week engagement.
Majiesto has the biggest week of anyone – ever. This means his haul of 83 new trophies (and 1,710 PlayFire points) was never bettered during the contest. Not even by Kawaii!
That said, collectively, this was not our biggest week (a grand total of 211 trophies were collected). That accolade goes to week three (303) when we all went Trophy crazy (except Brodiesan – see below).
In other statistical news: Phreaky collects his second Wooden Spoon, the only player to achieve this feat during the competition (Brodiesan got it once and had more excuses than Nixon in an effort to justify it).
The total number of Trophies gathered since the beginning of this whole experiment? 1,519.
The final (for now) leaderboard, courtesy of PlayFire.com:
Let’s see what the players had to say:
Danny_D: “It’s official.Â I am drunk with power.Â Furthermore, I like it.Â Despite reports to the contrary, there is no alliance between my great State and the Pandas to the East.Â Nor do I need one.Â My macabre genius alone fuels the fire of my indestructible armies.Â I am King. Commander D over and out.”
Kawaii: “I’ve had a very quite week playing a couple of games, neither of which have trophies. Christmas is coming though, they’ll be lots of new games and plenty of time to play them. I’m wondering how we can sabotage Danny_D, there’s got to be a way. Who’s with me?”
DolphGB: “In my quest for further trinkets, I have now bought an extra HD TV so that I can sit and concentrate on mining for platinum whilst the rest of the family gets to watch television, or enjoy making fun of my ‘game faces’. Either way, it is pretty clear I’m serious about moving up the ladder. Oh Sony, what have you done to me?!
Majiesto: “I finally gave in and got Burnout Paradise. Most of the team seems to have it so I decided to join them. It was a busy week for me as you can see. Moving up two spots (those guys at the top better watch out). Hopefully I can have a repeat week and catch up to the great DolphGB.”
Captain_Panda: “It’s been a quiet week on the trophy front, with Guitar Hero World Tour taking up much of my time along with that sad thing we call ‘real life’. I am however a bit sad that Danny seems to go all Nintendo on our secret pact …”
Phreaky:”Ok Ok Ok… I’m falling behind, I know! I’m trying to get in some real gaming time here, but there just aren’t the same number of hours in the day as there once were, along with a string of other unintelligible excuses. Maybe I’ll find a spare hour or two this coming week to devote to trophy scouring, but I can’t make any promises right now. I do have a holiday booked in for Monday week, so I might just see a wee jump in the trophy count there… *runs away to hide again*”
MeEdIC:”Looking good! 24 trophies seem pretty good for a rather busy week. My goal is to reach 150 trophies by the end of the year! This X-mas is all about gaming. Forget the Christmas tree and turkey; this year, my PS3 is going to be the center of attention. ”
Brodiesan: “I accept defeat with grace and utter bitterness.”
Check back next month to see how things have progressed/spiralled into total chaos. We may be issuing an order for radio silence right now but, trust us, the war will rage on in the background.
See you in December!